Friday's Angry Speedblogging

October 13 / 9AM

A few angry thoughts in short order:

Friday the 13th is Stupid

Quote-unquote news organizations and TV stations are orgasmic over idiotic stories like this. There is no superstition. If you believe in black cats crossing your path and broken mirrors and walking under ladders, blah blah blah, you're a schmuck, plain and simple. Eat a bullet right now. You're simply too dumb to be alive.

To the Web Designers of the World:

Please stop using the term mashup. It's old hat. It's just as annoying as Web 2.0. Your brilliant idea to create an AJAX-ified site that Google Maps all your Myspace friends? Been done a dozen times over.

But wait! How about a DIGG-iTunes mashup? Ya know, so people can like rate songs. But it'll be with AJAX so it'll be cool!

No. No it won't. Stop it already. Please.

Why, No, You're Not Getting a Tip

I'm a pretty generous guy financially. Unless the waiter drops a deuce in my food at the table, I'm pretty understanding, typically leaving at least 20% of the tab (15% if a deuce is in fact present). I tip my hair dresser or barber or whatever they're called these days. I never know if I'm supposed to, but I do. It's partly to blame for why I hate getting my haircut. I don't know why, I just hate it. I tip cab drivers - especially if they can get me from the East Side of Providence to Trinity Brewhouse in under six minutes ("There's a fiver for you. Keep the change." ... "Tank you buddee!").

But I do not tip the guy who vends my coffee from a volkswagen size machine at Dunkin' Donuts. Or the "baristas" at Starbucks. Just because the corporate a-holes at Big Wig Inc. believe that all the tip-happy coffee-sipping yuppies will be more than happy to subsidize said "baristas" $7.50/hr career, doesn't mean that I'm going to.

It's ridiculous and it's insulting.

There. I feel better. Now I need a hug.

What Now?

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Comments

Flippy Flap | October 18, 2006 09:37 AM

I just dropped a deuce in my coffee and it tastes so good that I'm going to tip myself!

Mike | October 20, 2006 12:25 PM

Oh that's naaaasty. (But do it in Cleveland's voice from Family Guy. See? Funny, right?)

Auntie Christine | October 22, 2006 05:42 PM

I have an extra midol if you need it..

Mike | October 23, 2006 09:27 AM

Nah, I know how bitchy you can get. You keep 'em.

web | January 18, 2007 12:11 PM

http://tinyurl.com/vy8zq Hit the 7:00 minute mark. "Tbone, its time for some crunching" [hits the floor laughing]

Mike | January 25, 2007 06:46 PM

Dude, WTF is that about? I love this comment left by whoever posted the video: "Boring until the 7 minute mark when the production is taken over by crack-smoking monkeys." LOL ...

The American Online | March 10, 2007 01:50 AM

http://www.ericwebster.net/2007/03/george_washington_cartoon.php